Titus 2:6-8 & Proverbs 20:7
“Do as I say and not as I do.” This statement frustrated me to no end when I was a child. You may not consider it, but children develop a sense of morality and fairness much earlier than you might think. I remember thinking to myself things like, “why is this thing okay for them but not for me?” Or “why should I have to do this when you never do?” Now that I have kids of my own, I am seeing that very same line of questioning from them. My youngest seems obsessed with fairness. “He got more dessert than me!”, is a classic and it may seem trivial, but what they are doing is spotting inconsistencies in the way I treat others. If we want them to develop a sense of integrity, we must show them what integrity looks like.
Titus 2:6-8 states, “Likewise, urge the younger men to be self-controlled. Show yourself in all respects to be a model of good works, and in your teaching show integrity, dignity, and sound speech that cannot be condemned, so that an opponent may be put to shame, having nothing evil to say about us.” Setting an example for my kids is the most effective way to teach them how I want them to act. It’s not always easy though because I often make mistakes and act in a way I shouldn’t and they catch that every time. I regularly notice my wife and I’s behaviors being mimicked by our children and most of the time that is very cute and makes me proud but sometimes it can be a real eye opener. For instance, I tend to show affection to my wife by lightly picking on her, and she does the same thing to me, but a few days down the road I hear one of our kids repeat the same thing to her and it is clearly not okay. The mimicked behavior was no longer affectionate teasing but rather an insult meant to hurt. At that moment I realized that I was not setting a very good example as to how they should speak to their mother.
The way I treat my wife and daughter will be THE example to my children of how a man should conduct himself around women. The way I treat my sons will be THE example of how to carry yourself around other men. The time spent thinking about how my children perceive me is time well spent because it is my duty, alongside my wife, to teach them work ethic, dignity, and the importance of the words they choose to use. It is not the most exciting or glamorous job, and it can feel like a heavy load at times, but it does bear fruit to, as best as I can, be a consistent rock in the life of my loved ones. What I have had to realize is that teaching them does not mean that I am long winded. Teaching them is being that godly example in their lives, and if I must, I can use words.
Titus 2:6-8 states, “Likewise, urge the younger men to be self-controlled. Show yourself in all respects to be a model of good works, and in your teaching show integrity, dignity, and sound speech that cannot be condemned, so that an opponent may be put to shame, having nothing evil to say about us.” Setting an example for my kids is the most effective way to teach them how I want them to act. It’s not always easy though because I often make mistakes and act in a way I shouldn’t and they catch that every time. I regularly notice my wife and I’s behaviors being mimicked by our children and most of the time that is very cute and makes me proud but sometimes it can be a real eye opener. For instance, I tend to show affection to my wife by lightly picking on her, and she does the same thing to me, but a few days down the road I hear one of our kids repeat the same thing to her and it is clearly not okay. The mimicked behavior was no longer affectionate teasing but rather an insult meant to hurt. At that moment I realized that I was not setting a very good example as to how they should speak to their mother.
The way I treat my wife and daughter will be THE example to my children of how a man should conduct himself around women. The way I treat my sons will be THE example of how to carry yourself around other men. The time spent thinking about how my children perceive me is time well spent because it is my duty, alongside my wife, to teach them work ethic, dignity, and the importance of the words they choose to use. It is not the most exciting or glamorous job, and it can feel like a heavy load at times, but it does bear fruit to, as best as I can, be a consistent rock in the life of my loved ones. What I have had to realize is that teaching them does not mean that I am long winded. Teaching them is being that godly example in their lives, and if I must, I can use words.
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